Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

Okay, really.... it's been a year. And I know that people do the whole "I'm going to update my blog since it's a new year" but then actually stop appx. four days into it. Which I'm not completely outruling. My MANY blog fans (I think there's fourteen of them) I'm sure have been waiting on the edges of their computer chairs waiting for me to update since last February. Oopsies. But I'm back for at least this post!

Now, let's get back to the traditions that once made this blog the amazing literary work that it is:

****POSTY POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's been so long, it's like I've seen so many things that I want to share with my fourteen followers. So just for you, I think I'm going to do a....DOUBLE POSTY POST!!!!!!!! What what!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLfWPLLn-QI
I've always been obsessed with Adele, but am newly obsessed with this song. Love it, belt it, share it.

And the double shot for you today is this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUX58Vi-YLg So you know those "shit (blank) say" videos? Well this is my favorite. Pretty accurate.

****One of my favorite traditions is back and better than ever-FRIDAY NIGHT HAIKUS. I know you missed them. So just for you, ah follower, I'm going to give you a few from the past year (slash week because I have a bad memory)

Living with Tbone
Going to knit a red scarf
Out til 7 AM

I'm that girl at bros
Best new years resolution
Did not pee my pants

Crazies at cornell
Vortex red wine and Hawkeye
My lips are black, why?

-And a new tradition, which isn't really a thing because if it's a tradition then it's not new...meh. I will post a picture of something that I would buy if I wasn't a poor person. Today's "Buy (if I'd Try)":

Thank you Burberry for making beautiful products. But no thank you for making them more expensive than my future salary will be.

So, hopefully I got your hopes up that I will continue posting...but we all know how reliable a theory that is. Maybe I'll see you tomorrow? Or maybe not...I'm mysterious.

Still can't belt the A flat,
Em_J

Hand driers.

SooooooooooOoOoOooOoOoOooOOoOOoOooOoOoOooooooooo, I'M BACK BABAAAAAAAY!

Since no one reads this anymore, I am just going to choose to never update and when I do update, I will probably post really pointless things hehhhhh. I was just thinking. I really HATE washing my hands in bathrooms with hand driers. I mean, I still do wash my hands because public bathrooms are gross and I need to wash my hands as much as possible. But really, those things are impossible. This is what goes through my head as I walk into a bathroom:

1. I have to pee.
2. Crap, there's a hand dryer.
3. Now I have to dread drying my hands the whole time that I'm going to the bathroom.
4. Should I wash my hands?
5. Yes, I need to wash my hands because I'm not gross.
6. Ughh my hands are really wet, maybe I'll try to use a little less soap and water so they don't take as long to dry.
7. Okay, I'll try to shake my hands as much as physically possible to dry them quickly.
--This is usually the point where I decide one of the following options:
A. Stay under the dryer for one second and then decide to wipe my hands on my pants, probably making them dirtier than before.
B. Challenge the hand dryer. I think to myself-My hands will DEFINITELY not be dry by the time this hand dryer turns off. I keep thinking this, but as I continue rubbing my hands together they get drier and drier. Needless to say, the dryer beats me every time.

So that is my everyday struggle with hand driers. Now, looking back at that passage I can't decide how to spell dryer (drier) as in they are more dry and the actual thing itself-dryer (drier)? Now I'm just confused, therefore making my hate for those things much greater. Because I love spelling.

No Posty-Post today, sowwy. But I will give you a Friday Night Haiku:

Albert is the best
Photoshoots with a hipster
Krumping to GaGa.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE TO ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
EoooooooMooooooooMooooooooooAooooooooo

It's gonna be a happy new yeeeeear!

HAPPY 2011!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woohoo! New year, new resolutions? I'm not really sure what mine are, so I will take a minute to come up with a couple:

-Floss.
-Take vitamins.
-Update my blog more often.

Those are super lame. Since when am I an adult? Gross. But seriously, over winter break I have focused in on my inner adulthood. I could be caught watching the midday news, Swift Justice with Nancy Grace, Oprah, Sell This House, and Wheel of Fortune (although I've loved that show since the womb). Am I a 70 year old? Possibly.

Now that I'm retired and SUPER RICH, I'm going to make a list of all of the expensive things that I want:

*Keurig Coffee Maker--This is one of the greatest inventions ever. My roommate just got this for Christmas and I seriously am in love with it. It's so fast and simple....you can't even understand until you use it. So since I won't always be living with Jake, I need to get one for myself. Luckily I am rich and 70.

*Nook--I just want it. I like reading and it would be cool to have it all in one place, plus with a nook you can also read magazines, read all the books that barnes and noble has when you are there, and it has many other features. I want it.

*Highest thread-count sheets possible--just because they're comfy.

*IKEA furniture--any and all of it that they have.

*Hot tub--it would just be great.

*Art--expensive art, giant pieces of art covering my whole house.

Wow, my life is going to be expensive and great. I LOVE IT ALREADY. Whew, this post really took it all out of me, so I think I'll go nap. Only a few more days until we are back to classes, not much more time for naps. LOVES YOU ALLLLLLLLL.

--EMONAAAAAY

Cue Happiness

FALL SEMESTER 2010 IS OFFICIALLY OVER! Woohoo, I'm finally done with all of my million final exams, projects, and papers. It's about friggin' time. I'm not exactly sure how I survived the past three weeks, but I did....I think it's a Christmas miracle. No more papers, or studying, or ANYTHING! Just a month of pure happiness.

Today has been a great day. The snow is very pretty, although it is slippery and cold. When I'm cuddle up in my blanket on the futon, I like looking at it. Not necessarily walking through it. So today I had my last two finals (woohoo again) and then my roommate Kelsey and I went to find an apartment and we signed the lease for one that we LOVE!!!!! It is going to be so cute and quirky, I really love it! So glad to have gotten that done before leaving for home.

Also, I FINALLY finished unpacking (haha yeah a whole semester later) and cleaned my room. It's almost complete--I'm just working on covering up the walls with stuff! Yay clean/unpacked room.

PoOooOOoOooOOOOoooOOoOOOOOoooOoooOooosty Pooooooooost!
This is quote that I very much enjoy, and since I'm so happy, I thought I would try to spread the happiness!!!!!

"Don't forget to dream big dreams, to take a chance and sing out loud,
to laugh at all the silly stuff, and tuck away some memories.
Don't forget to celebrate the real and true authentic you-
the one whose spirit shines so bright, the one who's loved so very much."
-Anonymous

I love it and it's true about all of my blogger fans!!!!! You are all loved! 'Tis the season to be jolly, now go spread some joy to someone, ANYONE, I don't care who it is!!! Keep smiling :)

Em_ J (P.s. anyone who's reading this needs to start calling me that. Thanks in advance.)

Oh hey, Emo Kid.

So, the semester is almost over. Yet I still have appx. one million things to do. Awesome. Not really sure why I'm blogging right now because I should be going to bed, but just can't. Just watched part of Inception and it was amazing per usual. Now I probably won't be able to sleep because I feel like I'm constantly dreaming. Then I'll have to get a totem. This could take a while.

This is basically just mumbo jumbo nonsense that I'm writing right now. Whateva, I don't even mind and I'm sure my non-existent readers don't mind either. :) Thanks invisibles.

Italian Thanksgiving Haiku:

Great friends and good food
Bitches be slappin' that bag
Wine hangovers suck

This is a NP^2 day. This entry kind of sucks, my apologies.

All my love,
Edurrrrt

Friday Night Haiku

HOLY CRAP, this is a legitimate Friday night haiku, because it actually happened on a Friday. Whoa.

Two parties converged
Mumbling through Taylor Swift songs
I hate Four Loko.

Gives you an idea of how I feel today. Glad I can put my feelings into poetry. Love you.
--E

おかげで (That means Thanks in Japanese!)

Thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For everything you do. Whether you're reading this and you are my BFF lova or you are just an acquaintance, or you don't even know me at all. I am thankful for you, and I'm sure many others are as well. Although, it's a little late to be talking about Thanks (you know, since we only have one day for that--Thanksgiving), I'm going to continue to show my gratitude throughout the whole year. What a friggin' concept!!!!

Thanksgiving was awesome. I seriously love eating. My friend Alex and I cooked with our two siblings, it was bomb. I'll walk you through our menu. Salad, rolls, cranberries, green bean casserole, sweet potato casserole, mashed potatoes, stuffing, corn casserole, gravy, turkey, caramel apple cheesecake, and pumpkin pie. HOLY CRAP, I think I gained 20 pounds. But it was totally worth it.

lalalalalalalalalalala. You know when you can't get a song out of your head? I have a love/hate relationship with that feeling. It's really weird because it's usually a song I like and it's just like playing really quietly in the back of my head. Currently it's "Memories" by Kid Cudi. Love me some Kid Cudi, but it's literally been in my head for like 72 hours. Oh well.

Friday night haiku of the week:

Avoiding creepers
On the dance floor at Toucans
"I'll make you fly girl."

Hope you enjoyed that one. That basically sums up my night (although it was a Wednesday night).

POSTY POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So my friend Matt has a great, up and coming blog about his new Fryer and the many things he fries in it. You should really check it out if you already haven't, because this is a BIG concept people. Live it, love it, eat fried foods.
http://fryology.tumblr.com/

So thanks again for being you, and I'll try to update soon. Loves it.
EMONAAAAAAAAAY